Are You Over 50 and a Night Owl? Wake Up and Smell the Coffee.
For instance, I’ve always loved to read. Normally someone will read until “bedtime”, slap a bookmark in, and pick up where they left off the next evening. Nope. I remember even way back to my grade school years staying up half the night to finish a book I’d been reading.
I don’t like being told what to do. I don’t like rules. And apparently, I don’t like a predetermined “bedtime”.
Having been a single mom who worked from home and had very active kids, I savored the quiet time after they were asleep, and usually extended it into the wee hours of the morning.
Throughout my life, even after my kids were grown and even after I had remarried at 50, I still continued that routine. I’ve owned few online businesses, and discovered that I did my best work after 11 p.m. No phone calls, no texts, no emails that needed immediate replies. I could focus better without interruptions, and my time was my own.
I’m sure you’re asking by now, “so where are you going with this?”. Well, here’s the deal. Lately I’ve been thinking that I may not be able to stay up half the night anymore, and function on just 3-4 hours of sleep. Wha-a-a-t? I know – to most this is a no-brainer. To me, it was a shock.
I’d been waking up tired (a lot of times late in the morning), and was annoyed as soon as I saw the clock because I’d lost half my morning. I’d go through the day in a pissy mood, draggin’ ass, not feeling like exercising, irritable, grabbing a handful of…whatever any time I passed through the kitchen, and feeling every single one of my 63 years. I drug myself through my days only to stay up late again that night. It was a vicious cycle.
Every night I’d make my to-do list for the next day (I’m a major list-maker). It started at 7 am: Get dressed. Walk. Shower. Water plants. Clean up kitchen. Make bed.
During my supposed “focused” time while I was writing my list, it all seemed so doable. I loved that my chores and exercise would be done by 8:15, then I’d start my work day. But like the saying goes, “It looks good on paper”.
Each day I’d get up late, and right off the bat be behind. With emails already piled up needing attention, calls needing to be returned, decisions needing to be made, I was forced to start eliminating things on my to-do list. Guess which item never made the cut? You guessed it. Exercise.
I’d beat myself up for what I hadn’t gotten done, and stress out about what I still needed to do. My mind was very rarely in the present moment. I couldn’t focus on getting one thing done, because I was distracted by the bazillion other things dancing around in my head, or scattered across my desk.
My husband, who’s a schedule person, has been trying to convince me for years that I’d have more energy and be more productive if I went to bed earlier “like most people”, and got up earlier in the morning. I’m not one that’s good with schedules or restrictions. I have trouble doing something because it’s what “most people” do, or because “it’s good for me”. So I basically told him to mind his own beeswax.
In my mind I’m still 40, but this ol’ body hasn’t seen 40 in quite a few years, and I knew that sitting all day at my computer wasn’t doing it any favors. I was well aware that I needed to exercise and take care of myself, and not doing it was stressing me out. I knew I needed to make a change or I was going to stroke out.
So this morning, I got up at sunrise, put on the cool Nike’s my daughters gave me, and planned on taking a quick walk. It was already warm out, but not hot. It was quiet.
When I headed out my driveway and clicked START WORKOUT on my Map My Walk phone app, I had the normal chaos filling my head, but after a block or two, the chatter quieted a bit and I started to actually look around me. As the sun came up, I noticed how incredibly clear and blue the sky was. I could smell the flowers in the yards I was passing. I was aware of the birds and the sounds around me. Even though I was walking at a pretty fast pace, it seemed effortless. That thought filled me with gratitude that I’m physically able to walk without pain.
That one thought started a snowball effect. Instead of the usual mental lists, my head was filled with only thoughts of gratitude. I was grateful for the life I’d been given and that I’m still here to live it when so many others weren’t able to.
And it continued…I was grateful that my kids are all healthy and happy, that I’m still madly in love with my husband who has stuck with me through the good and the bad. I was thankful for my health, for the work that I’m passionate about and am able to do from home… Our home… My determination… My empathy… Our grandkids… My friends… The closeness that I have with my family.
I didn’t want to stop walking. My body felt strong and my mind uncluttered. For 30 minutes, I’d found quiet and peace within myself.
Returning rested and clear-headed, I realized I got more out of my half hour walk this morning than the four hours I normally spend, late at night, in my quest for quiet time. I loved being in the moment. I hadn’t visited it in a very long time.
Damn I hate it when Paul’s right.
So I suggest to you, take a breath today. Look around you. Take a minute and be thankful for what you have. It’s the little things that go unnoticed, the things you don’t see that you take for granted. Acknowledge them. Don’t live so strongly in the past or the future that you aren’t able to see the present. Life is short.
Until next time…
Hi Patti, I’m new to #MLSTL so happy to find you! Like you, I’ve always been a night person, have my “to do” lists and many don’t get done. They just get continued over to the next day’s list. Every night I promise myself I’ll get to bed earlier, but 11pm is the earliest I’ve made it, but it does help. Three days a week I go to the gym, which is a Godsend, because my body is happy with me. I’m in South Texas so the idea of walking outside right now is more than I can handle. See you next week! Brenda
You made me laugh when I read “…they just get continued over to the next day’s list.” I do the same thing. Sometimes it seems I do more writing of my list than actually doing it. I’ve been a little slack this week with my walking. We’ve had 100+ temps here…yesterday hitting 105. That’s not normal for the Pacific Northwest. I’m anxious to get back out walking now that it’s cooled down. Thanks for dropping by Brenda!
Patti you are so right life is so very short and we need to pay attention to the here and now.
Victoria, it’s hard to do sometimes…to quiet the noise around us and go within, but it’s so rewarding. I’m still practicing. Thanks so much for stopping by!
I’m a fellow night owl – now retired but still writing mystery novels and love to read. Back in my professional years, I was often up to 1-2am working on client stuff, then back up at 6-7am. As long as I had a shower to wake me up, I was fine.
Even just five years ago, I’d sleep 8 hours if left alone. Now, no matter the time I go to bed, I wake up in 5-6 hours max. Groggy for an hour or two, night rolls around and I’m wide awake. LOL!
I’m not only an inveterate list maker, and have been for years, I have a hard time turning off the brain at night.
#MLSTL visitor (shared on SM)
Good grief Donna, are we related? I’m the exact same way. My body knows no clock. Last night I was determined to go to bed before midnight. I got interested in somethng and went to bed around 2. But I was up at 6 and went on a 2 mile walk. I seem to be more awake on the days I get less sleep. Where other people needed 8, my perfect amount was 6.
I’m also like you in that I can be falling asleep at my desk at 4pm, drag myself through dinner, and then raring to go again by 8pm. If I go to bed before I’m tired, my mind doesn’t get the memo it’s bedtime. I do better if I’ve made my list for the next day before I lay down.
It’s so nice to hear from someone who doesn’t think I’m nuts. Oh wait, you never said you didn’t think I’m nuts. Well…you know what I mean. I love that you write novels. I have been doing some research for an article I want to write and would love to find out more about you. Would you mind if I emailed you?
Hi Patti, I’ve never been a night owl but I do have difficulty sleeping which is strange considering all the exercise I do. However, I am a morning person and a list maker and I do enjoy the quiet of the house before my husband wakes. Going for a run or walk is a great way to start the day and also to focus on what we are grateful for. I wrote a post recently about ‘Gratitude Walking’. Yes there is a term for walking and focusing on being grateful. Thanks for being part of our #MLSTL community and reminding us to clear the clutter and be grateful. Have a beautiful day.
Ooooh, a fellow list-maker! We should start a club. I’ll have to check out your post about Gratitude Walking. I’m not surprised there’s an actual term for it. It just happens magically. I’m hooked!
Sue, I also got your sweet email awhile ago and realized I had never responded. I so apologize. I would love to add you to my next Women over Fifty Bloggers post. Let me know if you’re okay with that.
My husband is always telling me that “the morning is the best part of the day” and I consistently ignore him! It’s Winter in Australia and the mornings are cold and grey so I’m not leaping out of bed any quicker than absolutely necessary. I must admit that once I’m up and on my morning walk I appreciate every moment of it – life is so good atm and I totally agree that we all need to make the most of every moment!
#MLSTL 🙂
Leanne, you have the same husband I do! Isn’t it odd that when you’re out early in the morning, whether it be cold and grey or bright and sunny, you seem to notice things that you don’t normally during the day? It’s a gift that I’ve deprived myself of for too long. I’m glad you’re experiencing it too. Thanks for reading and your comment Leanne.
I used to be a night owl too! Not only that but I was like you and would read and read and read till the wee hours. Not anymore! I’m an early waker and riser now so ready for bed by 10:30pm (that is early for me) and sometimes earlier! I must say I do love the early mornings. I go to pilates class at 6:30am 3 days a week so I’m up at 5:30am on those days and often awake and up at that time on the other days too. How things have changed! Lol 🙂 (I’m here from #MLSTL)
Yikes! Pilates at 6:30 am? You’re a rockstar! I’m still working on the early rise. I’m there half of the time, so I’m considering that progress. I love the early mornings too, the problem is that I also love the late nights. That doesn’t leave me productive time in between. I’ll get there. Thanks for sharing, and thank you too for reading and commenting!
A walk does wonders to our mind and body. I love the present, too, Patti. Have a great day! Visiting from #MLSTL
Natalie, such a simple thing, but I swear it resets my brain. It forces you to be present. There is rarely a day that I’m feeling blah that even a short walk doesn’t perk me up. Thanks for your comment!
Hi Patti,
Newbie to your site. Totally relate to “Night-Owl” life.
After reading your blog, all I could think was “Yay, I can continue my late-nights ten years from now! LOL…I’m 53.
Like you, have had disdain towards predetermined bedtimes!
Seriously though, I realize already, that my body would benefit from an earlier rising and earlier bedtime.
Thanks for your words and humor, and for creating this site.
Hi Andrea, and Welcome!
Yay! I have a partner in crime! I’m still working on rearranging my schedule, but damn! I would hate to fall into the old cliche “you can’t teach an old dog new tricks”. I am determined. The last two days I woke up early (but I still went to bed late – grrr).
53? Ugh. You’ve still got a few years left to burn that midnight oil. But yes, if you work on the sleep thing now, you’ll probably be running marathons at 63. Good luck, and thanks so much for reading and your comment.
Patti, why are the things that are the best for us always the hardest to do?? I heard someone say that if sin wasn’t fun, it wouldn’t be so tempting. That thought in reverse applies to discipline too – if it was fun, it wouldn’t be so difficult..
Jana, I know! It makes absolutely no sense to me. But such is life…